Jedi Names for Fat Kids

In a galaxy not so far far away, the E-man was out and got so plastered that he poured coffee onto his pancakes and then could not stop telling this girl how he wanted to be a Jedi Knight.  This got me thinking...how drunk does one have to be to make the jump from "Do you want to drunken makeout?" to "I want to be a Jedi"? But then I remembered this video I had seen online of some chunky little kid bouncing around pretending he had a lightsaber and it hit me, I don't remember ever seeing a fat Jedi.  So this is a list of suggested Jedi names I have compiled for all you fat kids (and E) trying to be a Jedi.

1. Boba Fatt-Ass

2. Ham So-Slow

3. Fat Solo

4. Chewbacon

5. Jar Jar Peanut Butter

6. C3-Oreo

7. Want2Eat2

8. Lando Lakes

9. Poundo Fried Chicken

10. Darth Meatball

11. Darth "Where's the Foodcourt in this" Mall

12. Darth Milkshake

and last but not least...

13. Only-One Cannoli

Got a name I missed?

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